Who Knew?

Who knew this whole “moving across the ocean, studying a new language, starting your first born in kindergarten, and leaving your youngest at home with 2 strangers” thing would be overwhelming?!?! Oh I forgot to add being pregnant!

Although people who have “been there, done that” may have tried to warn me, there’s just nothing that can really prepare someone for this!

Lately the only word to describe how I’ve been feeling is overwhelmed (well that and nauseous!). We are trying to plan when this baby should be born (I know, right, like I can decide that!). I guess I should say how far in advance we should travel to the city 3 hours away (or more depending on traffic) where we are going to deliver. I was thinking I would go 2 weeks early- Brooklyn was a week early and they don’t want baby #3 getting to be as big as her (9lbs 5oz), especially since she got stuck while trying to make her entrance into the world! However, that is right in the middle of unit 8 of language study! And right before B’s K5 graduation! And we also can’t come back to our house until New Baby has a passport. And right after the baby comes we have to fly to a new city for a week of company meetings—with a 4 week old!

All this isn’t really about the new baby. I’ve had a baby before….2 actually…. But this time it's different. As I walk around the streets of SEA I see nothing but lostness. It is so hard to have the truth and to just want to share….and then remember “Oh yes, I’m still only in unit 3 and I just told someone I flew here on a nurse…oops I mean a plane!” (yes, those words are almost the same in SEA- who knew!) What if I say the wrong things? What if they don’t want to believe? What if I fail?

These things keep running through my mind, these doubts. Yet as I went to pick B up from school the other day G0d reminded me of two things: 1. It isn’t my job to save the people- its HIS! In Acts, Je$u$ says we are to be His witne$$es, and 2. Learning a new language isn’t the only way to be His witne$$! 1 Cor 13 begins by saying, “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.” Who cares if I learn the language but I’ve only been running around here stressed! It’s kinda hard to love people when you’re stressed, wouldn’t you say? Normally I breeze right through that verse…”Yah yah tongues….we don’t believe in that any more!” But now, now that I’m sitting here right now learning the language (well actually I should be sitting here right now studying!), the verse has a whole new message: Nothing Annette is doing right now is of any value if I’m not living a life full of love! WoW

Although I’m trying to look at this whole experience in a new light, I can’t help but wish I could just throw my language book up to Him and that tomorrow I would know it all (aren’t we told to cast all our cares on Him?? I know…bad hermeneutics!) Pr@y that Hubby and I will be diligent in studying and that some how we will master this language…sooner rather than later!